I have no business being a blogger.
I'm far too sensitive to the potential that my words might offend – or worse hurt another person. I worry too often about ruffled feathers (think this post and this one) and yet am still compelled to state my own truth and share my vision of this life. I wonder if I am ever misunderstood, and with no way of reading you (except through your comments) I will never know. Worry, fret, write, repeat.
Seriously. I'm perpetually surprised that I do this.
Believe it or not, I'm a quiet, keep-to-myself, almost anti-social girl. (Almost? Who am I kidding?) I'm happiest at home with my family or curled up on the couch with a blanket and my knitting. And yet I come here every week and reveal myself to you. And sometimes I feel a little vulnerable.
This week has been hard. My rhythm is out the window, the laundry is piling up, and some things that I thought were coming together seem to be falling apart. While I have the perception to understand that everything is happening perfectly, it still sucks to have it not go along with the script in your mind. A hot bath and a good sleep are a great remedy and I've also just discovered that these cookies and this tea are bomber stress medicine. (The cookies I subbed lime for lemon and honey for agave if you care to know.)
And so every day (or every few days) I come here and I share some thoughts, sometimes light and easy and sometimes walking the line of being controversial and you respond. You share. You comment. You pass it along. You make me feel like these words matter and what I come here to share matters. On the easy days and the hard ones.
I'm not sure exactly what the point of all this is, but to reveal yet a bit more about myself. Oh, the irony.
When I wrote the post about the little girl a couple of days ago I worried that I'd offend someone and perhaps I did. I'm sure I did. But those of you who commented were kind and loving. Most of you got what I was trying to say. And if you challenged me at all you were respectful and gentle yourselves. Thanks for that. I can't imagine doing this if it frequently went any other way.
In this amazing technological way we're become community, you and I. We've gotten to know each other. And I treasure that. Truly. It's a big part of why I come here. Maybe the same is true for you.
In the spirit of community (and for a little sweetness) I wanted to share this. Remember this post about mothers helping a family in need by sharing their breastmilk? Below is a musical thank you from the family that was (and continues to be) supported by those mamas. I thought you would enjoy. In fact, I knew you would. Becasuse I'm getting to know you pretty well. 🙂
Thanks for coming along on this ride with me. Thanks for getting me. And for being so darn nice to share this journey with.
Hello Rachel
Big hug from across the atlantic – well done you.
SusieXXX
i love your blog. it has given me encouragement. it has given me ideas, and recipes. thanks, and you totally have business being a blogger.
This was so beautiful. I wish I had been able to help with something like this when I was a lactating mama.
I love your honesty, and understand where you’re coming from because it sounds as though our personalities are quite similar. Thank you for continuing to share your family/life.
Hugs from AZ,
anne
And just think Rachel, just think… YOU did that. YOU organized that. I am proud to “know” you.
Hey, if you weren’t so real, I wouldn’t be reading this. <3 to you Rachel
If I were Ryan Gosling I would tell you: Hey girl…nothing wrong with having an opinion. Do you want to go yarn shopping this afternoon?
Thank you for having the courage to speak your mind! I will continue to read this blog regardless of where I stand. I can appreciate that we all come from different perspectives. It’s important to feel like you can express your opinions and still be loved for them. Sending you love from the high desert.
Amazing. I completely agree with Jessica. If you weren’t real, we wouldn’t read. We all feel like we know you. I’ve gotten so many ideas from you. Some I’ve tried, some I haven’t. I read every post and always take something away that is worthwhile. Thanks for making us think. And the video is adorable!
oh my, that video made me cry! Seems like you live in a pretty sweet community. Also, thanks for sharing all that you do. I am so inspired every time I come here.
Haha!
Rachel – I love your blog. I love that you share and are honest. And I love the community that I find in blogging, too. I feel exactly the same way you do – needing to share my opinions but afraid to offend. And I do sometimes (with the most surprising posts – not the ones I expect). But the great thing about this world is that we can disagree – or appear to – and still stay in touch and discuss.
You started a great discussion the other day with your sparkle blog. And it brought up emotions in me that I had to explore (which I did here if anyone is interested: http://sandiratch.blogspot.com/2012/02/mothering-with-mood-disorder.html). And I’m glad I did and I got a great comment from one of your readers who went to my post. We can each have bad days, but sharing our own honesty is precious and we need to keep with it. You didn’t offend ME in any way – I just needed to explore the emotions that arose after reading your blog.
I have just recently found your blog and love it. You write with courage, compassion and remain true to yourself. Keep it up, we love it!!
This video brought tears to my eyes, so very happy for this family. I love what a community of caring women can do.
Thank you.
There’s so much love for you here, Rachel. You have a way, and we all like your way, and your realness. I especially like to read that things aren’t always as you would like them to be, not for your suffering, but because it makes you more real to me.
just wanted to chime in and say i’m another one who appreciates your honesty and realness. even if i disagree or do things differently, i find your perspective beautiful. always. i love “knowing” you here and i admire your courage to reveal yourself.
Rachel, I’ve never posted a comment before but read your blog daily. I just want you to know that I’ve come to look forward to your thoughtful, wise, authentic words and appreciate that you find the courage to press publish every day. You are a bright light- shine on!
Oh rachel you have every Right in the world to be a Blogger. You are honest, caring, compassionate, very real, creative, understanding, couragous – amongst so much more. I look forward to reading your writtings because it gives me encouragement on things i wouldnt get it from anywhere else. I love your creative ideas and how youre willing to admit when youve had a bad day (as we all have) – my rhythem to has been throwen off by my two sweeties having the stomach flu. They are all healthy now so thats good – but even through the chaos of that (and laundry:) i looked forward to your writtings. Yes rachel i would say you have every Right to be a Blogger – youre a darned good one.
I feel the same somehow, but love to read you, thank you for sharing.
Bravo to you, Rachel (and to that lovely papa singing his heart out!). So honored that you can share with us and speak your truth.
Oh well, I’m new here, and I didn’t participate in this breastmilk enterprise, but I love watching a story ending well. This family looks so kind hearted and I’m glad they were helped in that way. And above all, I love seeing manifestations of gratitude and kindness 🙂 🙂 Well done folks!
I love your blog. Although, I just came across it last month, I’m in agreement with everything I’ve read. You’ve given me great ideas, helped me get rid of my son’s lip rash (thanks to your toothpaste recipe), and made me wish I was still nursing, so that I could have donated my milk to the wee won. You have also inspired me to unschool my son when the time comes. So thank you so much, Rachel. If for some reason I would not agree with you, I know at least I would learn from you.
Your comment laid Pete out, face down on the desk laughing. Me too. Thanks, Cassandra. 🙂
Best comment on a blog EVER! 🙂
I can’t help but focus on the video. I was smiling and in tears the whole time. Thanks for sharing it. All those mamas have made SUCH a difference in the life of that little one and her family. I also felt the intense mama-love while that mama was looking at her little one and holding her to her chest and it didn’t really seem all that important that the breast milk was from someone else and contained in that bottle, because it was delivered with all the love of anyone nursing their baby! So beautiful.
Oh, and on another note, many peole feel this way about blogging. While the community that you find here is probably too important to you to turn off the comments, I thought I’d share a recent post about this subject:
http://www.theminimalists.com/comments/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+theminimalists%2FHztx+%28The+Minimalists%29
Awesome 🙂
I love your writing. I don’t follow comments enough to know when there are controversies, if there are any.
I love it when people speak their truth, their mind, their vision, in love. YOu do that Rachel and you should feel strong about letting that light shine.
Easier said than done. I know.
This video made me cry. Powerful. Way to go, Mamas.
You already know my thoughts on the video, so “*chuckle* *sniffle* *heehee* *sniff sniff*” will suffice.
As far as your blog…lady, you are a huge inspiration to me. I try to live my life more peacefully, more purposefully because of YOUR influence. Your words. You aren’t just talking the talk, you’re walking the walk and that means so so much. Just know that you’re appreciated and loved for all you do.
xo
Thank you Renee. I respect your words very much.
Rachel
Thanks Sandi. I think what comes up for me is that my words caused hurting. And maybe that hurt is part of healing, but I still struggle with it. I knew you weren’t offended, but your stuff was stirred up and I don’t want to be the one to do it. I think you understand. Peace, Rachel
Thank you Monica. Truly.
I appreciate knowing that different can still be beautiful. <3
So kind. Thanks, Dawn.
Oh, Lori. I think you’re biased. You like me for my soap. 😉 But honestly, thanks for your kind and thoughtful words. See you in April.
So lovely. Thanks, Tameka. And welcome to this space.
Yes indeed. SO much love, in so many ways.
This is great. Thanks so much for sharing, dear friend. (love you)
So kind. Thank you Casey. Really.
From one anti-social mama to another, we love you! you’ve been very inspiring to me and my family. keep going! 🙂
Ah, I love your blog. I just found it and can’t stop flipping through your posts, despite really needing to go do laundry, clean the basement, wash the dishes, yadda, yadda, yadda. Keep at it!
My first time visiting your blog…And I get to experience a banana singing about breast milk. This is why I love my life!!!!
Is this where I say: You killed my father. Prepare to die.? (Glad you enjoyed the breastmilk banana ballad.) 🙂
sensitive is good 🙂 love the vid :):)
So sweet. Thanks, Julia!
Thanks, mama. I will!