Some days are hard.
Some days my children have misplaced their good attitudes and kind manners. Some days they don't want to help or participate or cooperate.
Some days are all resistance.
Sometimes as a parent it's hard to find the loving words. And the patience. Sometimes it's hard to keep my cool. To not raise my voice. To not resort to simply being the boss and choosing more old-school "because I said so" parenting energy, or inching towards punishment and reward.
Yes. Sometimes it's hard to practice what I preach.
But I'm trying everyday to keep at it and parent they way that I believe. I keep inching towards becoming the mom I want to be.
Sure, I slip. But as soon as I recognize it (or find the capacity to change my path) I return to what feels right.
Last week I was at the lake with my kids. A mom, struggling to keep up with two toddlers and two dogs in the company of an un-supportive boyfriend turned to me with an exhausted look on her face. "Why don't you have to yell at your kids to get them to do what you want?"
My heart was breaking for her. She was working so hard. I told her that my kids were older than hers and that we'd found our groove. 5 and 9 is not 3 and 4. Not by a long shot. I acknowledged that toddlers were a lot of work and then she ran off down the beach, chasing a child or a dog while her boyfriend baited his hook and smirked at her rushing about.
Before we left I told her that she deserved more respect. Because she does. She deserved to have support. Compassion. Connection.
We all deserve these things. And as mothers it is vital. If not from our partners (if we have one), if not from our extended family, if not from our community that surrouds us – at least from the communities that we find or create elsewhere.
Last week I peeked around at the peaceful parenting conversations going on in our More Peaceful Parenting Facebook Group and was so inspired by the support and love that you are offering each other there.You are talking about big and personal struggles, and you are being met with grace and love and wisdom. I'm so glad.
As some of you have noticed, I quit the More Peaceful Parenting series her on the blog. When things got a little strained last month I felt a bit too vulnerable to write about parenting – a topic that seems to stir up a lot of energy and emotion.
And now I'm wondering if that has let you down.
Today I want you to tell me if you'd like the peaceful parenting series to continue. Was it helpful for you? Do you want more tools or have you had enough? Or do you prefer things a bit more light over here?
I've intentionally kept the subjects more superficial here during the past few weeks, but what about now? Should we dig back in? Are you wanting more?
Tell me what you think. I'm listening.