Not alone

You are not alone : : Rachel Wolf, LuSa Organics : : Clean

My whole family has the flu.

First Sage, then Pete, now Lupine. All three are still in the thick of it.

And I'm worn thin today from caring for these sick ones the past few days, while juggling all the rest that's on my plate. I cancelled a meeting, two demos, and two work days this week already, despite still playing catch-up from our time away.

And while I am grateful to have a self-constructed life where I can cancel meetings and skip work, it's still tiring. And I wonder how I could manage if we had three, four, or more kids. (Parents of big families, I salute you.)

If I'm honest I'd admit to being over it. I'm weary and a tad short-tempered and overwhelmed, despite myself. I've said things like, "Did you really just spill a second bowl of soup?!" instead of dancing across the kitchen like Mary Poppins, singing while I wipe up the mess.

Grace and patience are normally my strength, so it's hard when I can't seem to find them.

I went to bed early last night (to snuggle a feverish little one) and rose early this morning. (Even with flu in there air, there are only so many hours a person can spend in bed.) In the still darkness I made coffee and lit a fire in the wood stove, trying to carve out a moment alone to center myself before the day began.

To prepare for today and choose my focus.

Today. I will tend what most needs tending. I will not get sucked under into the suffering. I will find grace.

 

Because this is motherhood.

I wouldn't trade it for anything, but it's some serious hard work.

 

All of you struggling mamas out there, I see you.

With your harried work-school-daycare schedule and past-due bills; with your middle of the night vomit clean up and your overwhelm; with your heavy heart and busy schedule; with your worry and hope that you'll get this right.

 

You are not alone.

We stand together. Tired and undone, but together. 

 

6 thoughts on “Not alone

  1. Carmen says:

    Thanks for this. Goodness, this is exactly what my Mama heart needed to read today. And thanks for what you do. Your words and images are always appreciated. xo

  2. Krissy says:

    Yes, we have had flu and other yuck viruses this year too. Sick children are always such a worry! I hope for health and wellness for you all –sooner rather than later.

    Your writing is always so real, and so beautiful because of that–thank you for always sharing.
    Take care!

  3. Natacha says:

    We are in the same boat! All four of us are having the flu right now. My kids are 11 and 13, so at least they stay in bed, but I still rememeber the days when they were toddlers and taking care of them when I was sick myself was SO hard.
    Take care!

    Natacha (from Luxembourg)

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