Oh, my. Some news.

Lupine's birthday was perfectly lovely. A few dear friends, a treasure hunt, some tea in fancy cups and some grain-free cake and treats. 

Peg doll birthday. | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

Sixth birthday. | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

Sixth birthday. | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

Sixth birthday. | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

Country birthday. | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

It was nothing short of lovely.

And the setting didn't hurt any either.

Magical house in the country, creek gurgling at the edge of the pasture, pink sunset behind the ridge.

Family farm | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

Let's take another look at that, shall we? (Come to think of it, you've had a few sneak peeks already. Especially this day.)

Family farm | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

Family farm | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

Because… yep. You guessed it. We've found our country home!

It has been a long time coming. The road here has been up and down. But we held fast to the vision and trusted that yes, it would happen. It would happen someday.

And today all of that wanting and visioning seems like a lifetime ago.

Family farm | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

Family farm | Clean : : the LuSa Organics Blog

We've been contemplating this very farm for no short of two years. And now that our house is sold (eek!), we're ready.

Strangely (for a country girl who has been
temporarily displaced to a small town for the past six years) I am
paralizingly terrified by this move.

I'm not sure why. I guess because it feels big. Like our last move. For a long, long time.

And also perhaps because we've been trying so hard for so long to get back to the land.

So tonight is our
last night in town. In the house where Lupine was born. And in the morning there will be a horse trailer
full of our belongings heading to the country.

Eeek! So excited, and so terrified – all at the same time. Truly, I am at a loss to explain why this move has me so undone.

(Say something encouraging, won't you?)



64 thoughts on “Oh, my. Some news.

  1. Christa says:

    Oh how wonderful!!!! Yes it will be a lot: stuff moving around, cleaning, redecorating, home impriving and all that won’t be done in a week (I’m speaking from experience >.< ) but this will be your Home. Yes with a capital H. It will be worth it!!! I am so happy for you all!!

  2. Shannon says:

    Way to manifest lady, WAY TO MANIFEST! WOOT! I have been following your country dreaming turned reality all this time…..knowing that it would happen for you.

    Enjoy your new home and all the blessings it brings 😉

  3. amy delaterre says:

    Well done Rachel! That is so exciting! Change is un-nerving, perhaps that’s why you’re freaking out a little bit about it. And bittersweet, leaving behind a place you’ve lived and loved and birthed a baby, this is big. But evolution requires continuous forward motion. You’re going to rock your country homestead. Can’t wait to see some pictures! Good for you and your family!

  4. kara decarlo says:

    It’s change and change is scary. But it’s also good.
    You’ll put down your roots and build a whole new home out of memories, and laughter, and silence.
    Wishing you joy as you start this new chapter!

  5. Cassandra says:

    Squeal!! Congratulations! Moving is always a fretful time, no matter how much you have wanted it to happen. Your new place looks absolutely divine…you will be making us all green with envy with all sorts of images of this magical house for years to come I’m sure. 🙂

    P.S. – Don’t forget to leave your broom at the old house and buy a new one!

  6. Anne says:

    I write this with tears of joy in my eyes for you and your family. Change is exciting and wonderful and sometime challenging, so many good things will come out of this move. I am beyond thrilled for you and your family. So, so sweet. I can’t wait to hear about your new home and journey. Enjoy!

  7. Aja says:

    I kind of feel like the biggest and best changes in our lives usually have us feeling completely unraveled. It seems like we are always an emotional wreck before the best changes are made….maybe that’s just me. I am so excited for you. This is going to be great 🙂

  8. Mary says:

    Hi Rachel,
    We don’t know each other, but I have tears in my eyes for you and your family! It IS big! And exciting! What a beautiful vision you have held– it’s finally happening. And it’s gonna rock.

  9. Jess says:

    HOLY MOLY! Such great news! I nearly cried reading this. Congratulations! My husband and I are looking at buying 45 acres of farmland and it’s been a lifelong dream to do so but I’m having a hard time deciding if I really want to leave our current home. My husband built it himself, we got married in the back yard and it’s the place we brought our newborn home to. It’s hard to let go of all of that. But I know if I don’t take the opportunity if it comes through, I’ll miss out on my dream. You’ve found your dream and now it’s time to move forward and make some new amazing memories! I hope we’ll be as lucky as you and your family…even if it’s bittersweet

  10. Wendy says:

    Congratulations! What exciting news! Sometimes when we dream about something for so long, when it actually arrives, maybe we get scared because we’re not sure that reality will live up to our expectations. But I bet it will be better than you imagined!

  11. Marian says:

    Congratulations! Being in the middle of a move ourselves (alas,not to our dream home this time…) I would say that having everything packed and ready to move you’re thru a big chunk of the bad stuff 🙂 Together you will make it fantastic! Best wishes!

  12. Judy says:

    Congratulations and all the best to you and your family! Sometimes I think that when the things I have really wanted for so long actually come to fruition it is almost too hard to accept that they are real or possible or happening- now what?!; these visions had a life in dreams and conversations that seemed just a little bit out of reach and yet so perfect that it would be wonderful. When so perfect, it would be wonderful shows up I think we need a little more space than our wee bodies allow to celebrate, scream, hide, pause, reverse, laugh, cry, enjoy,etc. May you be present, alive and fully at the helm of creating this experience while allowing of your wonderful thoughts and feelings to be acknowledged and let go.

  13. Kestrel Gates says:

    My family is in a parallel universe over here! We have been working on this move to the country for years as well and are closing on our house the day after tomorrow.
    I am all nerves and deer in the head lights-shocked. It is just so big.

    And I trust in Grace to move through each of our enormous transitions!

    Thanks for sharing and I am so excited and grateful to be getting a little peak into your experience.

  14. Miss Gratitude says:

    Why do you need people to say something encouraging? You have accomplished a dream. You’re the last person who needs encouragement.

    You went from a really nice house in a really nice neighborhood in a really nice town, sold that in a relatively short time, and are now moving to your dream home in the country. And you want encouraging words?

    If you want some perspective to help you process all of this, maybe you should go visit an inner city ghetto, or maybe the streets of foreclosed homes in crumbling towns. Better yet, swing by any social services office, take a nice big whiff of the desperation all those people live in every day and be grateful for how amazingly awesome you have it.

    Some people work themselves to death and only end up more screwed. You got to go from an awesome life to an even better life. I’m not saying feel bad for it, by all means enjoy the shit out of it, but don’t sit there and talk about how scared you are and ask for encouraging words. You don’t need encouragement for anything, you already have it all.

  15. KC says:

    Eek! Awesome. You have manifested and it came to you, moving is always a little scary but once it’s done, it’s done. We are moving from the desert to the east oats to manifest our dreams and that has me a little terrified too!

  16. Susie says:

    That’s amazing news Rachel! We just found out yesterday that 3.62 acres of the Scottish Highlands (complete with log cabin) are (finally) going to be ours. So I completely understand what you are feeling. It took a long time to sell our house, then we missed out on some other houses we loved but now! I feel like our journey is finally beginning. Best of luck my dear – and thank you as always for your wonderful writing.

  17. Adeola says:

    Having a dream right there in front of you instead of on the horizon is terrifying, wonderfully so, but you and your wonderful, amazing and precious family know that at the end of that first day when everyone is finally in bed, you will lie still, listen and breathe, and know that you are exactly where you are meant to be.


  18. Jessica says:

    Congratulations! Being at the top of a roller coaster is a fun kind of scary though isn’t it? Life is one crazy, wonderful ride! Enjoy!

  19. Kim Miller says:

    Oh yippee! This is the post I knew would be coming when you last posted about your intentional community farm plans falling through. I am so glad you found your dream. It is hard to let go sometimes even when you are going toward something you want. You have so many memories of the house you are leaving but remember the home you have created is in your heart and with the people traveling with you to your new place. The love for the old place will still be there with plenty of room for love and happy memories at the new one.

    Happy travels,

  20. Em H says:

    That is tremendous news! I’m so very glad for you. I’m sure it will be a wonderful step for your family and your business, and I look forward to you sharing your stories of getting settled in and back to the country. Congratulations!

  21. Teri says:

    I understand the big feelings. My family just packed up and moved across country from Oregon to Missouri, where we own 30 rural acres of land and are creating a homestead. But we left behind our community, our home of 13 years (and yes, the place where we birthed our two children).

    Moving is big and scary and hard. It’s a big transition, full of the unknown and of potential. So breathe deeply and ease into this transition. For me, it was a great opportunity to learn to ask for help.

  22. Nahuatl Vargas says:

    I’m so happy for you all, and I know you just find your way, remember, is just one day at the time, so breathe, I know dreams that come true scare, but do not be afraid this time is really here, what you envision, so enjoy.

  23. Val says:

    Isn’t it wonderful when what is meant to be coincides with what we want!! What a beautiful farm! Once you get settled you will find that this place is a perfect fit for you and your family. What a wonderful place to raise a family. Congratulations!

  24. Sarah says:

    If we all thought like this, no one would ever have permission to feel genuinely happy or sad, worried or giddy, overwhelmed or burnt out. It’s a shame that you feel the need to criticize genuine emotion just because some people are worse off. Someone will ALWAYS be worse off – that doesn’t invalidate another’s experience.

  25. Melanie says:

    Eeek! That IS exciting! And scary! It’s only scary because there’s so much for a mama to do when it comes to moving. We just moved to our dream country home last year and frankly, it was hard to remain excited and hold on to the thrill. There’s just SO MUCH WORK for a mama with little ones. It helped to just take deep breaths every day and remind myself it doesn’t all have to be done at once. Relax. Take walks outside and marvel every evening. And think how your chickens (and kids ;P) will love it!!!

  26. Carol says:

    Oh wow, Rachel! Jamie said it, I have goosebumps for you. Such a big move should inspire some awe, which is closely situated to (healthy, life-giving) fear. Best wishes to you and your family.

  27. Bronwyn says:

    Deep breath. This is good. Too good to believe? It will be wonderful to be in the right place and give you, Pete and the kids that family home that they will come back to when they are older. Well done!

  28. Mikaela says:

    Oh, change is always so scary, isn’t it? It’s hard to let go of what’s familiar, even if you think you’re doing the right thing. Just take it one breath at a time…

    So freaking excited for you all!

  29. Karla says:

    Congratulations! I think it’s normal to be a bit intimidated by change – even the good change! Think of how you felt becoming a first-time mother – that’s a wonderful thing, but scary at the same time.

    Also, you’ve been looking forward to this for so long, had some setbacks along the way, so it would only make sense that you feel a bit of trepidation. Now that it’s actually happening, let the reality just soak in!

    Best of luck as you set up your new home! How far is it from the town? I know you love the area in which you live; will it be much different?

  30. Tricia Millix says:

    Oh….this has brought me to tears!! We too are right on your heels of finally finding ourselves in the middle of our dream. I am also a country girl that has been living in a small town for the past 14 years…longing to get back to where I am from…who I really am! We have been looking at our dream farm for just under a year, but we are still faced with what to do with our current home and settling those last few snags. I cannot wait to feel what you are feeling at this very moment…..I believe you feel un-done because you are shedding all that you no longer need and you will discover exactly who you are and want to be without all of those things weighing you down! Embrace that feeling and know that as soon as your feet hit your farm for good you will feel the ground like you have never felt it before!!

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