In my heart.

In my heart. {Clean.}

In my heart I desire days that are free.

Free of worry and regret.

Free to wander.

Free to live full. Out loud. And real.

Real in their messes.

Real in their connection.

Real in the work and struggle and joy that is being alive.

In my heart. {Clean.}

In my heart I want to look back and see the shining faces of my children looking back at me,

smiling

from my memories.

Without regret.

Without clouds across their eyes because I can not remember.

Because I was not here.

In my heart. {Clean.}

In my heart I want so much to never again answer the question, "How are you?"

with the apologetic – or proud – reply of,

"Busy!"

But instead with the words

Happy

or

Thankful

or

Blessed.

In my heart. {Clean.}

In my heart I want to leave behind anxiety and worry.

I want to shake off fear.

Fear of getting it wrong.

Fear of judgement.

Fear of everything falling apart.

Fear of being seen with my dirty floors and piles of laundry.

And instead embrace this day.

This life.

This moment.

For all of its messes and imperfections.

In my heart. {Clean.}

 In my heart I choose to put down the need to do it all.

I release myself from the pressure to get it right, because it's all right already.

In every sense.

 

In my heart I mindfully choose the path most joyful.

Because it leads to the life that I want.

Yes.

I choose joy.

And I am joy.

 

 

10 thoughts on “In my heart.

  1. Michelle says:

    I like the idea of this and of course our children need us to be present and listen to their stories “with our eyes”. Seeing the joy in my daughters eyes when I am really listening to what she is saying is reminder enough that their stuff is important to them, no matter how unimportant it may seem to us. But I ask you… what about those dishes and laundry? Someone has to do it.

  2. Rachel Wolf says:

    I believe we can be present while tending to the dishes and the laundry. But for me it comes down to knowing that it will all get done – eventually. Does it all need to get done right now? No. Can I be seen with it all 1/2 done? Yes! Can I shake off the cultural need to look as though all my ducks are in a row? Absolutely.

  3. Fräulein Rucksack says:

    This is so sweet. I love your blog but I wish it would come by mail oder somehow in a touchable medium… to keep it for later or find the page accidentially months later somewhere inbetween things…

  4. iilene says:

    thank you for being so real and putting your insecurities out there. you are not alone in your endeavor to live in the moment and seek peace and quiet in your heart. thank you.

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